Are resolutions really necessary?

I have never really understood the concept of resolutions. How can a calendar be the catalyst to make you change something about your life? If you want to do something different then do it now, no need for January and the big announcement, its so cliche, like getting engaged on Valentines day (probs just offended a load of people there - sorry, sort of).

In my thirty (plus) years I have drifted in and out of making resolutions as the majority of them were not feasible whether that be financially, logistically or there were other limitations in the way. Such as when I decided I was going to be an Astronaut, the limitations there were staggeringly against me, I get travel sick easily, I couldn’t put my makeup on properly wearing that big fishbowl hat and all the food is powdered carb-based. My best resolution was around three years ago and I made a resolution to not make any, ever. I simply have a set of choices, let's be all modern and call them ‘lifestyle choices’ that I live by, every year. Now, before you read on, I am not going to suggest that all of these lifestyle choices are advisable, and they are not for everyone, I do not have all of the answers and many of these resolutions have gotten me into trouble from time to time, but if you're already planning on only eating vegan grapefruits until March, read on, no one likes that person.

Buy the thing.

A pretty obvious one for me, I tend to always buy the thing that I have fallen in love with. However, it is not as straightforward as that. If I see something whether I buy it or not if I'm not thinking about it 48 hours later, it’s not the one for me. This could be anything from a vintage dress, a big shoe spend or a high street staple jumper. If I have not styled the entire item in my head within the first two days of possession then it is a sign from my fashion gut to return, return return. It has to be something that you love, if you don’t love it then it is never going to work for you. I can tell you all about the regrets and the ones that got away before I decided on this life rule. My greatest and most painful regret to date is when I broke my heart and wept actual tears when I procrastinated about a Vintage feather dress from The Way We Wore, in LA for too long and it was gone, the shop assistants comforted me, brought me water and had sad sympathetic eyes, understanding the emotional attachment that a dress can bring. I think about her every day, as I said, buy the thing.

Sometimes you can still buy the thing but it is rarely that easy, I didn't originally buy this Alice McCall dress (see below), and she was one that got saved. When I say saved, what I means is I could only find her on a random website from a store in the UAE that only sold within the Middle East. So I had to pay for a private courier with a UAE address to pass it on the DHL via a Swiss address..... there are no lengths I wouldn't go to, and yes, I still wear it!

Eat the pizza.

I know that after my post ‘Does my diet have more issues than Vogue?’ There were a lot of questions and comments about my attitude to food and eating habits, but I stand by it, I have never said that I was perfect and had all the answers so sod off with any judgment, be judgey elsewhere. I have always been careful about what I eat, I can fluctuate a few pounds but reign it in when I need to, it is self-discipline and a way of life rather than a diet. But, when I want, it, I'll eat the pizza, devour the chocolate or drink the fizz. I don’t eat it every night but when I do, I eat. I pick and choose my indulgence when it counts whether that be socially or for what is on offer, I don’t want to eat Susan’s Mum’s leftover 60th birthday cake on a Tuesday at 3 pm at work when I am dashing to a meeting but I do want to eat the Domino’s (other pizza places are available) on a Friday night catching up with all of my crap TV.

Shed the tears.

There is so much falseness in the ‘what’s up hun?’ generation that we live in. Say that you’ve had the ‘worst day of your life’ on social media and you’ll be well into double figures of likes and emojis however I bet you don’t get even a quarter of that in Birthday cards. Sadly, like me you will find people, in general, don’t give a shit, unless it is about them, the ones that do give a shit, well, keep a hold of them ones, they are as rare as a zero credit card balance. Showing my emotions and wearing my heart on my sleeve is something that I have become less afraid of as I have aged. If a friend has really hurt you, don’t ghost them, tell them what they have done and take time if you need it. If you are happy, tell someone why they make you feel that way. I know this sounds naff and I could go on, life really is too short as I have seen too many times, hence the first resolution - just buy the thing.

Wear the sequins

People talk about each other, all the time, human nature, I do it, you do it, we all do it. Therefore if they are going to talk, give them something to talk about. There are things that I have worn that have given strangers something to chat about, it's not always pleasant and in most cases, unless you are wearing something ridiculous (that you would be aware of) the sniggers and side-eyes are jealousy as people don’t have the balls to wear what you are wearing. Since being a blogger I am constantly amazed by the girls that have the real confidence and the ones that don’t, I wouldn’t say I was up there with the super confident girls but I am a lot better than I was. If you knew how much I hated having my photograph taken it is amazing how far I have come. So don’t save the dress for best, don’t keep the bag for the occasion, just wear it and don’t care what others think, at least you will know what they are talking about.

Be brave, be kind.

This is me in a full San Bernadino Fire Department uniform with an axe ready to be brave. This actually belongs to my friend's son Brandon. He looks a lot cooler in it than me, wouldn't take much, I look like a tit.

This is the bit where I make my bid for an OBE or even just a Pride of Britain so that I can have a night out with Cheryl would work too. Stop and help. In the last few years I have talked down and then helped drag a jumper back onto the right side of the Tyne Bridge, intervened with a homeless person being attacked by a hammer and stemmed a blood flow of a stranger that had attempted suicide (using my beautiful scarf that I never got back). Some of these may seem like crazy things to get involved in but I go home and think that I did everything I could. Also note here, that I don’t contact the local paper as some people do, my recognition is my conscience…. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want the OBE! Let’s face it when my number is up, at least with all the blog photos on my Instagram it’ll be a stunning shot in the paper over a heroic headline and my Mum won’t have to dig out some awful photo from the ’90s. I understand that everyone wants an easy life and doesn’t want any trouble and there have been some awful incidents where people have suffered a terrible fate by being a bystander so don’t blame me if you decide to intervene in something and it goes tits up. You don’t have to put yourself at risk to make a difference if you’re a total fanny just do something nice like buying a person in the Starbucks queue a coffee. Just so you know I am not Mary Poppins, a lot of my brave deeds only cancel out that I am thoroughly sarcastic or unpleasant the rest of the time.

So as you stroll into the next decade, don’t put too much pressure on yourself with unrealistic resolutions, focus on quality and not quantity in all aspects of your life whether that be relationships, food, fashion or goals.

Happy New Year Fashionistas.

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